I'm writing this on Saturday, August 6, 2011, the day of my father's passing. For almost a week he was in the care of an incredibly supportive team of hospice doctors, nurses and aides at Highland Hospital in Rochester, NY.

My Dad was a strong and active man throughout much of his life, and nearly 30 years ago - while still very much in his prime - he made it clear to both my brother, Ed, and I that he never wanted to end up being kept alive in some faltering, incapacitated state. His precise words were something to the effect that should he ever lose the ability to think or act independently and have to depend on full time nursing care and/or artificial means of life support he wanted to be "killed."

In fact, Dad was so adamant about this that he completed a living will some years later making his wishes on this matter clear beyond question.

On Thursday, July 28th, 2011 my father suffered a severe hemorrhagic stroke that left him partially paralyzed and unable to eat, speak or independently manage even the most basic of physical functions. For two days the ER doctors worked diligently to stabilize his condition before consulting with my brother as to my Dad's wishes regarding further life-sustaining measures.

Referring back to the previously mentioned living will, the medical team was instructed to forego any additional efforts to keep him alive.

By their own consensus Dad would have been wheelchair bound, would most likely have never regained the ability to speak or effectively communicate with the outside world, and would have required a feeding tube and some kind of 24/7 nursing care in order to make it from one day to the next. Given that he was already experiencing hearing loss, advancing dementia, and a constitution that was feeling the effects of old age prior to the stroke, Dad would have been facing the exact quality of life he was most opposed to.

With a clear understanding of our father's wishes my brother and I felt completely okay about turning him over to hospice for end-of-life care.

And before going any further, let me say that this article isn't in any way meant to be a specific critique of hospice and the role it serves in the dying process. The people involved in taking care of my father in his final days were the kindest, most compassionate and heroic caregivers one could ever ask for. Over the course of six days they provided round-the-clock attention and monitoring that virtually assured my Dad wasn't experiencing any pain or discomfort as he neared the end.

He was plugged into a Morphine drip that - along with scheduled injections of Ativan - kept him in a near-comatose state where (we assume and hope) he was removed from any awareness of dying and/or the pain of physical deterioration. However, as we sat with him day after day marking time until his inevitable demise, Ed, his wife, Donna, and I became ever more incensed at an end-of-life process that seemed anything but humane to either the person dying or the loved ones forced to watch helplessly from the sidelines.

Though the hospice procedure Dad underwent is sometimes referred to as "letting the patient die with dignity," it might be more aptly described as "slowly killing the patient by starvation and dehydration."

This is a process that if conducted in any setting outside of an appropriately staffed and supervised hospice environment would be considered cruel, barbaric and inhumane. As civilized and compassionate human beings we would NEVER allow a beloved pet suffering from the ravages of age or a terminal illness to slowly die this way. We would end its misery immediately by "putting it to sleep." In fact, that same standard of mercy is typically applied to pretty much ANY animal whose pain and suffering we have the ability to end.

Even more astonishing is that we allow and provide the same expedited "send off" to convicted felons on death row! Death by lethal injection is now the preferred method of execution in those states that still sanction and carry out capital punishment. It's a largely painless procedure that usually does its job in about 10 minutes. Compare that to the six days it took hospice to kill my father via a death-with-dignity protocol and you'll begin to understand why we became so pissed off.

Until experiencing the death of a loved one first hand I never quite got the Big To-Do surrounding the life and practice of Dr. Jack Kevorkian, a.k.a. "Dr. Death." Between 1990 and 1998, Kevorkian assisted in the deaths of 130 terminally ill people.

In each of those cases, the individuals themselves allegedly took the final action that resulted in their own deaths. Kevorkian only assisted in that process by attaching the individual to a "euthanasia device" that he had made. The individual then pushed a button that released the drugs or chemicals that would end his or her own life.

Despite performing a service that was requested by each and every patient, Kevorkian was persecuted and ultimately prosecuted for his actions. Beginning in 1999, Kevorkian served eight years of a 10-to-25-year prison sentence for second-degree murder. He was released on parole on June 1, 2007; on condition he would not offer suicide advice to any other person.

More recently we were treated to the public spectacle of the Terri Schiavo case; a seven year US legal battle - lasting from 1998 to 2005 - between the legal guardians and the parents of Teresa Marie "Terri" Schiavo that ultimately involved Congress and President George W. Bush. At the heart of the matter was the right of Terri's husband to choose (on her behalf) the merciful and expedited termination of her "life," which at that time was defined by doctors as being a "persistent vegetative state."

How can this be? How can a society that condones the "merciful" and immediate killing of suffering animals and death row inmates NOT allow fellow human beings (or their legally appointed guardians) the right of choice when it comes to their own deaths? What gives any government agency, medical association or religious institution the authority to overrule the wishes of clear-headed individuals on a matter of such personal and critical importance as the way in which they want to be allowed to die?

According to recent surveys nearly 70% of Americans polled support euthanasia. But for some unfathomable reason the wishes of those nearly 220 million people are being ignored.

America was founded on the principles of freedom of choice and the rights of the individual. Unfortunately, we've seen many of those rights eroded or completely taken away over the years because of the influence of special interest groups and entities whose own agendas or beliefs trump those of the common citizen. While there are clearly areas where government oversight and guidance is welcome and necessary, this isn't one of them.

I don't need nor do I want someone else's beliefs (religious or otherwise) dictating what I can and can't do! All of us should have the right to live our lives and choose our means of death without interference from anyone. As long as my actions and choices don't cause direct harm to another person they should be honored without question or debate.

It should have been possible for my Dad's life to be immediately extinguished instead of sustained for days on end. EVERYONE should have that choice, and they should know upon making it that their wishes will be honored and carried out. Let's reclaim the promise offered by our Founding Fathers and take back our rights as freethinking individuals. Only then will we be able to choose not only our way of life, but also our way of death.

Tags: Death, Dying, Human Rights, Personal Choice, Euthanasia, Jack Kevorkian